An Outsiders Difficult Choice

by Craig Spinks

October 29, 2012

The section of this video that throws a lot of people is when Klarissa says that her friend reassured her that “this was the best option”. Did her friend cross the line from love and acceptance to endorsement for something she didn’t agree with? Maybe, maybe not. This blurry line between acceptance and endorsement is one of the things Jim, Todd and I discuss quite a bit in the paperback edition of The Outsider Interviews. In the book we argue that situations like these are rarely clean-cut and also offer some practical ideas for ways to navigate these kinds of situations. We can debate hypotheticals and discuss Klarissa’s story all we want, but I’m not sure how helpful that is in real life. Perhaps adopting some more over-arching values would be more helpful? For me, one of those values is to keep the focus on the other person and not let my own discomforts hijack the conversation. I’ve found that principal to be very freeing, giving space for me to be a better friend.

What kinds of things help you as you interact with people who make decisions you disagree with?

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